Sorry, about the lack of update on this blog. It’s just that I’ve been so lost and confused recently, I seem to have lost my direction. Inside of me I feel really heavy, yet I cannot express the feeling I’m suffering from. Only if I can scream or cry out every single bit inside of me, only if I can express this feeling to you...Only if..., but all these are only achieved in utopia, and not in the world I’m living in. I have always wanted to update my blog but there’s something that is persistently stopping me from pressing publish…

Everyday the world is constantly circling, and so is everything around me. Only if things stayed the same, at least i may be happier that way, but that’s just impossible, I should move of from my fantasized world, maybe it is time for me to change as well. Someone said that I should try and explore things that I never use to do, maybe they’re right, at least then I wouldn’t have to live in the cold and dark world…
When I needed someone to talk to or walk through the miserable times with me the most, only him and my family was there to support me when the rest of the world let me down, It felt like they were all stabbing knifes into the unhealed wound. The pain and torture has taught me that the world has moved on, and I should face reality…

Air....

I wonder how many people actually read my blog now… Probably not a lot, due to my lack of updates but there’s just too much happening in life. Time is always ticking, it won’t stop for the sack of one so all we can do is to carry on bravely through all the up’s and down’s.

I really appreciate those of you who have always been around to support me and listen to me when I speak with frustration. Thank you for the air that you have brought to be during those difficult times but soon it will all be over. Sometimes I feel so cold, so helpless …it’s unexplainable. I finally realise how dependant on other people I am, as an individual deep inside I’m actually weak and useless…

When i was a little girl i had so many dreams and wishes that i wanted to come true but recently everything seems to be going down the dark narrow forest and all these dreams and wishes seems to be eradicated. Has the thief come to see me and decided to take everything away ??....

I'm not sure whether you have had a feeling when you don't feel happy, but at the same time you don't feel sad? Or when you think you maybe feeling sad but you can't really find a specific reason why, or when you think you have a reason why but you're not sure if it's the real reason why? ..haha..i guess it's pretty confusing, right ? Maybe the thousand of questions that i have maybe insoluble, untill hopefully when the right time comes...

Changes...

As everyday passes there are things beside me constantly change. Sometimes in life no matter how much someone wants to resist or prevent the changes it's just impossible. I understand that there are changes that some people may want to happen but at the same time some people may be dreading it but without accepting the fact that everything changes, we cannot find perfect composure. But unfortunately, although it is true, it is difficult for us to accept it. Because we cannot accept the truth of transience, we suffer.

Ferris Wheel...

Did you know that Seeing or riding on a Ferris wheel in your dream, suggests that you are going around in circles. You are heading no where. Alternatively, it is symbolic of wholeness and the circle of life. Life is full of ups and downs.

I suppose i'm not the only one who feels uncertain about where life is leading to and what is actually expected from life,To be honest who actually knows? The important thing that i've understood is that if you don't try something then you'll never know whether it's suitable. A lesson that i've learnt from someone is that there's a 50% chance to everything but if you don't even try you'll lose the 50% and may live your life full of regrets...

I'm Back Homeeeeeeeeeee !!!!

I'm finally back home from my 1 month vacation! Yay! It seems like an awfully long time since I’ve last spent time with my family but now they will have to put up with me for more than 2 full months…hahaha….I’m so exhausted now, need to recover for a while to restore all my energy back ^^ haha…I wonder how long “a while” will last. kekeke

Although tiring, it’s actually been a lovely time and I just want to thank everyone for being there to accompany me and take me around to see local attractions and most importantly to eat food!! Thank you all !!! Hehe, it's so different to meet Bristol people in different locations especially in HK where almost the whole of culver house was there...

25-06-2009 I'm Back !!!

It's been quite a while since my last blog entry, but I’m still around …somewhere. The lack of updates where mainly due to some “shocks” and “downtimes” that occurred, but I’m almost fully recovered already. I have to be brave, I can’t let those who support me be disappointed. I really want to Thank those who have been around to listen to me ramble when I’m upset and who endlessly supported me.

Anyway, it was my brother’s birthday yesterday but because of some issues we had a little celebration today instead. To be honest, it wasn’t really a celebration just a cake and photo session. It seems like a long time since we have taken a family photo together, but hopefully next time when we take a family photo there will be some additional people (or should we call them intruders? Joking joking, hehe)